Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in snurrie's LiveJournal:

Thursday, January 22nd, 2004
2:50 am	THE... FUCK??!!!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!??!!!!!!!!!!!! oh my GOD my life is over.. i think i got a white-tailed deer pregnant over the holidays. it all happened durring the week after christmas. i went to visit my old elf friend Farlus who handles the deer, IF YOU GET ME!!! yeah, ok soooo... every year after "the delivery", they have a WILD party with fuckin booze and bitches and all kinds of shit i like. since i always spend christmas ALONE, i decided to say fuck it and have a dandy old fucking time MY WAY. without those gay ass fairies comin to my door tryin to bring me "GOOD CHEER"! fuckers. so i get there and the party is going and everyone is DRUNK as FUCK. and i am swimming in a vat of corona.. or so that is what they TOLD ME it was. anyway, the loudest partying was comin from santa's place, as fucking usual. that guy is hardcore like a BITCH on CRACK! so i go into his hut and shit, and there he is with his WANG stickin out of his pants, wavin it around, trying to play softball with some of the elves heads and shit. FUCK! santa was on one of his speeedball and wild turkey binges, as EVERY YEAR. i didn't wanna hang around that fat bastard. he's such a DICK when he's off the wagon. "things'll change once i hit 30" yeah.. RIGHT. so i got the FUCK outta there and went to go find Farlus.. on the way out some hooker handed me some black pills. yeah i took them. anyway so i stumble out back to the stables.. THE NEXT THING I REMEMBER IS I AM LAYIN NEXT TO VIXEN, NAKED, IN A POOL OF MY OWN SEMEN!!!!!!!..... atleast, i THINK IT WAS MINE! SHE IS KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT FROM TOO MUCH JAGERMEISTER AND HER HOOF IS SQUISHIN MY BALLS! so i RAN the FUCK out of there and never looked back. just left her there, passed out and was like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SEE YA! and *VOOOOOOM*!!!!!!!!!!!!! last i heard, shes fuckin gettin a little fat and moody.. and she's been tryin to FIND ME!!!!!!!!! askin Farlus where i live, and what my number is and shit. MAN I DON'T EVEN OWN A PHONE! this BITCH is CRAZY! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!>?W?>>!>!>!>?????????????????????? Current Mood: worried (Comment on this)
Sunday, March 23rd, 2003
11:28 pm	I AM ALIVE@! oh my GOD! i was in fucking jail. okokokok okoOKOKOK@Q!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wait. something happened with two cases of beer and a cod and some guy dressed up as marilyn monroe or whoever.. the deetails are sketchy and i still can't find my pants. BUT! i was arrested for ..something i dunno these LAWS or whatever that shit is. WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH MEEEEEEEEE????????? and they fucking stuck their fingers UP MY ASS looking for CRACK. well fuck, they could SEE my FUCKING CRACK right THERE. i felt bad for the cod. in any case I AM HERE NOW! and as soon as i find my pants i can go back outside.. fucking LAWS and their PANTS rules. fuck. Current Mood: frustrated (Comment on this)
Monday, February 18th, 2002
4:11 am	AHHHHHHHHH~~!!!!!!!!!!!!111 I LOVE MONKIES!! they chain smoke and fucking always wanna give you bananas. FUCKIN WILD, MAN! YEAAAH!! Current Mood: FUCKIN YA!! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, February 17th, 2002
2:37 am	FUCK! that little motherfucker CUPID shot a FUCKING ARROW right into my damn HEAD! what a fucker. i think that asshole needs fucking GLASSES or some SHIT LIKE THAT! and let me tell you people, this shit didn't even happen on valentines day. it fucking happened like 4 days ago!!! thats why i ain't updated this. FUCK! Current Mood: pissed off Current Music: i don't FUCKING KNOW! some ASSHOLES i guess. (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 9th, 2002
8:05 am	EYE ARE BORED fuck man, there aint shit to do at this hour, unless you wanna watch Elrub the Elder Gnome scrub his ass in his outdoor bath. that ain't pretty. ( i took a survey to pass the time ) Current Mood: bored (Comment on this)
7:21 am	WOO! FUCK YA! DUDE CHECK IT OUT! a friend of mine made a pic of me, cause i like refuse to take pictures and shit and she was all like "snuuuuuuuurrie, you need a piiiiic" and i was like 'fuck. no.' and she was like "YESSSSSSSSSS!! people want to know what you look like!" and i was like 'fuck. no.' and then she was like "well FUCK YOU snurrie!" and then i THREW a can of tuna at her. it missed her. but whatever. so she fuckin made a pic of me, and i was like ya thats cool or some junk like that. i added the text though cause i am so cool. Current Mood: hungry Current Music: The mutha' fuckin Who.. they are so old. DAMN. (Comment on this)
7:02 am	dude, rock n fuckin roll. why is there a carp in my bathtub? AGAIN!? (Comment on this)
Wednesday, February 6th, 2002
7:50 am	i beat my meat.. i beat my meat! i BEAT my MEAT! I BEAT MY MEAT!! no, really. i beat my meat cause i was hungry and there was this dove that landed near my tree, so i BEAT it. now its tender. so, get this shit, right, i was outside "watering" the garden and some fucking gnome walked past my tree and was like "hey, dude, nice tree" and i was like FUCK YOU ASSHOLE. then he started callin me all kinds of names and i was just like, whoa fucker, what is YOUR problem, man? and he was all like "fuck ME? fuck YOU! blah blah!" some people, right? geeze. Current Mood: crazy (Comment on this)
Monday, February 4th, 2002
4:46 am	dude, where are my pants? today i woke up pantless, in a bed of cheetos and beer cans. i THOUGHT i heard it raining but when i stumbled out of my tree, i found a white tailed deer pissing on my bluebells. the first thought that came to mind was, "if you can't beat em, or kill em.. join em." and there, i relieved myself by emptying my bladder. it scared away the deer. i am alone. i also stole my neighbor Herlop the Itchy Troll's nerwpaper. sucker. Current Mood: full (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, February 3rd, 2002
4:53 am	please add me as your FRIEND! DO IT! aww come on. i like, you know, rock and junk. I FUCKING ROCK! if you are still uncertain, here are some pros and cons to adding me as a friend. pros: my NAME is SNURRIE. come on. thats cool. i am a dark elf which means i am evil. EVIL IS COOL! if you add me as a friend, i most likely will not eat your first born if you like bells, dude i am the ONE! i tinkle alot... um, you know what i mean, DAMNYOU! i like to invite my LJ friends to parties in my hollow tree. dude, the beer flows like fucking WATER. cons: i don't bathe often, so i may smell. i pee freely. you may find me humping wild bunnies. but, look, its consentual. I SWEAR! i swear. i will most likely eat your firstborn ANYWAYS, buuuuuut, hey, i'll apologize for it. Current Mood: hyper Current Music: -buuuurp- where the fuck is my cd? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
4:19 am	all your base are belong to SNURRIE!!!!! Small sleek and potentially devastating, rarely seen these days and rather retro. Computer virus quiz snurrie took this test because snurrie is l33+. YES! snurrie does not condone the use of tests. NO! snurrie will not post tests often. MAYBE! Current Mood: energetic Current Music: RAMONEEEEEESSSSSSS WOOOOOOO! (Comment on this)
3:06 am	i am the walrus!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH HAPPY DAY! i have my own live journal! YES! i shall now proceed to orgasm on a wild long haired rabbit!! ooh ooh you BASTARD! DON'T RUN FROM MEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! Current Mood: anxious Current Music: led fucking zeppelin (Comment on this)